Returning back to Denmark and especially Copenhagen was something of a culture shock which has given me rich occasion to compare life here with the one I and others lead in Afghanistan – this is only normal and certainly for a professional dummy like myself. The shock manifested itself with the town seeming foreign, distant and with an atmosphere that just loomed of social constraints of what to do, how to look and where to be. To me, the sensation of having to fit in was very similar to the one you have when you walk the streets of Kabul without a head scarf. Some of these constraints got to me and have produced some of the thoughts in this letter. It has created a doubt in me that when I return to Kabul, I shall once again need time to adjust…? (that there will be yet another culture shock !) This adjustment being of the same character as the necessary change in behavior and mindset I went through during my first time in Afghanistan: switching off the charm and direct eye/contact, not staring at people and drawing attention to myself.

I wonder whether my coming back to Copenhagen will also have changed something in me regarding my relationship or my way of being towards my afghan boyfriend- for the better or the worse…? Though, I did not go for 5 months and have been in daily contact with Afghanistan, I still believe returning to one’s cultural background – which is so very different – is bound to bring out some personal traits that might not be quite so acceptable on the Afghan cultural/social scene. I probably will feel the need to slowly to readopt to my Kabuli identity.

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